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The Most Important Thing I Learned From My Life Coach

Without a real commitment to what I say, the words I shared with myself and others were easily discarded.
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The Most Important Thing I Learned From My Life Coach

The last time I shared one of my “Weigh In Wednesday” posts was 84 days ago, and a lot has changed [or opened up] for for me since that post.

I just wrote that a lot has “changed” for me, but in actuality nothing has changed, I’ve just become more willing to be “open,” to be more “coachable and teachable.”

I’ve become more willing to have others, in the capacity of a life coach, help me discover my “blind spots.”

I’ve become more willing to ask for, and receive coaching by people who I trust to support me in living one of my favorite Joseph Campbell quotes:

“We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

Or, truth be told in my case, quite often “not planned.

As I sat down to write this article, I started to go backwards looking at past #couchkills posts where I had proclaimed a multitude of “what I was going to do’s”, and “what I wanted to creates.” At first I had intended to clean up what I perceived as broken promises that I made to myself, things that I shared with everyone that I was going to do.

I thought that would be a good place to start.

And then I stopped myself.



Well, over the past couple of months, my coaches have helped me see that my incessant pattern of constantly thinking [about being right… wrong… right… wrong… right… wrong…], looking, and talking about my past wasn’t helping me in the present, let alone creating the future that I said I wanted to create and live.

I also started to realize that I may have had the best of intentions when I shared my enthusiasm for a number I wanted to see on the scale at some given date, or for some event that I wanted to participate in. But I’ve also seen how easy it was to say it, vs. to actually do it.

For me at least, without a real commitment to what I say, without a plan, without a willingness to be insightful, without being open and honest, sharing all of that with a committed life coach, or coaches, the words I shared with myself and others were easily discarded.

That way of “being” had me stuck in limbo, a self imposed “Groundhog Day.”

I also saw that even though people tell me that I can be a powerful life coach for them, I wasn’t able to be a powerful life coach for myself.

Abraham Lincoln said it best for attorneys, but it could be said for any profession: a doctor, a trainer, a life coach…

“He who represents [trains, coaches] himself has a fool for a client.”

I know, I know there are some people that don’t have a trainer, who don’t have a life coach and they do just fine (or maybe it just appears that they’re doing fine.) All I know is that the most successful professionals, business people, and athletes that I’ve had the honor of meeting and getting to know all have advisors or coaches. These people help them see their blind spots, and support them through their most self imposed rough patches.

So what I discovered that was missing in my life was surrounding myself with committed and powerful coaching.

No more.

I have a coach.

In fact, I now have quite a few very committed coaches who are collaborating and partnering with me to help me:

“Get rid of the life I’ve planned [or not planned], so as to have the life that is waiting for me.”

And, in the process, what we’re discovering and learning together will be shared on #couchkills, to help people create a life they love and to live it well too.

So as tempted as I am to explain “why” I haven’t written for #couchkills in 84 days, or why I stopped running every day, or why I decided to stop training to run the NYC Marathon this November, or why I weigh exactly the same weight I did 84 days ago to the ounce (268.6lbs), the real breakthrough for me at this stage in my life is the peace and power I’m getting in leaving my past in the past so that I can live powerfully in the present.

And living powerfully in the present isn’t about perfection; it’s about being present, and present, and present…

For me this is another “blank slate” moment, a place to create from, and it’s also a very freeing cathartic space that I’m creating from.

This post isn’t about pontificating what I’m going to do, or not going to do, it’s just a space, a clearing to leave my past in the past, and…

“A willingness to get rid of the life I’ve planned [or not planned], so as to have the life that is waiting for me.”

Maybe what I’m sharing seems a little vague, a little whoo whoo and that isn’t my intention. So I’m going to hand you off to one of my amazing coaches, Andrea R. Kao, founder of Run to 1 Coaching, as she shares her 1st #couchkills article: where Andrea helped me discover about why or why not I should be running this years NYC Marathon. It’s titled “Why I coached Him Out of Running a Marathon: or Quitting a Marathon to Live a Marathon Life.

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